Nicole Miller
Contributing Writer
Way up in the skyscraping numbers of a Bright House digital cable box lays a buffet of fabulous channels often unsurfed. Let’s change that.
1. IFC (113)
The Independent Film Channel is the brilliant misfit in a cable theater dominated by shiny HBO and Showtime menus. Here, you can find reruns of the high school burnout “Freaks & Geeks” (including Seth Rogan and James Franco when they were little ones) and off-the-wall skit shows like “Whitest Kids U’ Know.” The constant conveyor belt of indie films can cater to anyone’s taste—especially those flicks with one-word titles that require a jab at the Info button. “Bully: Teens” beat bully (Nick Stahl) to death in a swamp. Yes, please.
2. Nicktoons (144)
No, seriously. Those of you who are aging steadily in your early 20s will understand. You’re a ’90s Nick kid, and don’t let anyone tell you different—especially at 3 a.m., when this channel is dishing out an assembly line of “Rocko’s Modern Life” or old school “Ren & Stimpy.” Sometimes you can catch an episode of “Action League Now!” or “Rugrats” (before they grew up). If 3 a.m. is too early for your drooping eyelids, DVR is your friend. Happy Happy Joy Joy.
3. Sleuth (130)
Law and Order. Monk. Monk. Monk. Monk. Law and Order. The Dead Zone. NCIS. NCIS. NCIS. Law and Order: Criminal Intent. House. House. House. House. House. House. House. House. House. House. House. House. House. House. House. House. You figure it out.
4. GSN (116)
Name something of his wife’s that a man might secretly use… while Al from “Home Improvement” hosts one of the rotating “Family Feud” eras on the Game Show Network. Carlton from Fresh Prince hosts the card-flipping “Catch 21” (see if he’ll do the dance) and “Chain Reaction” is the ultimate compound word game. You can even spot ancient episodes of “The $25,000 Pyramid,” when people still referred to it as “making whoopee,” and Dick Clark still had dark hair.
5. A&E Biography (104)
So, you want to know more about topics like Metallica, Gwyneth Paltrow, Rodney Dangerfield, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Led Zepplin, how “Jaws” was filmed, Dolly Parton, “American Gangsters,” Kirstie Alley, Jennifer Lopez, Ozzy Osbourne, Martina McBride, famous mobsters, “Psychic Kids” and people who have died and lived to tell about it? Sweet. This channel is for you.
6. The Hub (102)
Before Neil Patrick Harris was filmed snorting coke off a stripper’s backside in “Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle,” he was the prepubescent star of “Doogie Howser, M.D.” The Hub is the digital vortex of all shows nostalgic and corny. Relive “the Fonz” essence along with Kevin Arnold’s life narrator in his “Wonder Years.” Sprinkle in some “Fraggle Rock,” “Laverne & Shirley” and “Batman” episodes from the ’60s, and you’ve got a time machine that’s only three clicks away. “When last we saw the dynamic duo…”
7. Logo (147)
Thanks to MTV, members of the LGBT universe finally have a channel to call their own. Sketch shows like “Jeffery & Cole Casserole” or “The Big Gay Sketch Show” can cater to anybody with a good sense of humor, while reruns of “Queer as Folk” and “The L Word” gladly run alongside the occasional Buffy marathon. When an exploding disco ball of color is flashing on your flatscreen, “Rupaul’s Drag U” is about to begin. Watch how Drag Professors help women find their “inner drag diva” through hilarious transformations that are way more entertaining than that Real World nonsense. Oh look—MTV finally did something cool.
8. Cooking Channel (142)
Just when we thought charming English chef Jamie Oliver vanished from food TV, we rejoice—he’s simply relocated to Food Network’s sister channel. Aside from “Jamie at Home,” you can also find delicious deviants like “Bitchin’ Kitchen” and elderly episodes of “Iron Chef” that still scream “Allez Cuisine!”
9. ID (135)
Investigation Discovery is the dark alleyway for whodunit junkies. Mysterious shows range from “I (Almost) Got Away With It” to “Cold Blood,” or “The FBI Files.” “Most Evil” fulfills this channel’s sweet psych role, with criminal profiling of stalkers, murderers and people who… eat other people. Hey, someone’s gotta do it.
10. Current TV (128)
Can you watch someone “Kill It, Cook It, Eat It?” Depending on your gag reflex, each hour-long episode descends into the gory underworld of the food industry. Watch as six volunteers pick a cow out of pasture, take part in its cycle of death and debate whether they want to eat the fresh burger on their plate. Sensitive stomach? Follow “Vanguard” to bust pot growers, locate ecstasy labs or experience other in-your-face realities. With random documentaries about gaming addiction or Kurt Cobain.
Thanks you!