I don’t think we understand love.
This week, Nicholas Sparks, the beloved author of the most cherished romantic novels in America, announced this week that he is divorcing his wife of 25 years.
And social media blew up.
The website Mediaite calls Sparks the “author who taught America how to love” and claims that his divorce means everything we ever knew about love is a lie.
I feel sorry for Sparks. He never deserved that title in the first place.
I apologize now if I offend any fans of Sparks’ work. But I think we need to take a more critical look at what we are actually reading and watching.
I’ve never been a fan of chick flicks, but after repeatedly being told that The Notebook was one of the most genuine love stories out there, I decided to watch it. The Notebook is one of Sparks’ most famous novels and was made into a movie in 2004. Yes, there are some sweet moments, but I wouldn’t call it “the most genuine love story.” Not by a long shot.
The movie is split into two parts: An elderly woman suffers from dementia, and her husband stays by her side, even when she forgets who he is. Now that is a selfless act, and because of its selfless nature, I could call it genuine love. But her husband tells her a story, which ends up being the story about how they fell in love. And for me, that’s where the disconnect comes in.
The story details the lives of Noah and Allie, a couple separated by circumstances beyond their control. Allie becomes engaged to another man, but when she is reunited with Noah, she cheats on her fiancé with Noah.
And this is supposed to be the greatest love story of our time?
I don’t think we understand love.
Sure, don’t get married to someone if you’re not confident about it. But we should not consider a story about an affair to be a great story of love. Because those oogly-googly feelings will pass. Then, what’s left? Cheating with someone else?
Love is selfless. It’s a commitment to endure even when it’s not easy. And ask any married person you know. It’s not like the movies.
Enduring through the hardships is what makes a marriage grow closer. It’s actually a beautiful thing.
I feel sorry for Sparks and all the marital pressure he endured from his fans. But I mostly feel sorry for the people of my generation, who think that a romance novel provides the greatest love story of all time.
