The Duke University freshman, who works under the moniker Belle Knox, didn’t want to take out loans to pay for her school’s $60,000 per year tuition. So, she joined the porn industry.
The decision, which many might consider outrageous and distasteful, was easy for Knox, who said her experience in the industry has been nothing but “supportive, exciting, thrilling and empowering,” in an essay for xojane.com
Though porn stardom may not be everyone’s ideal path to higher education, Knox’s story is important. Not surprisingly, she received hate mail, death threats and was even told she was shaming her university when her secret got out.
But Knox’s story is bigger than her critics. Through selling her sexuality, she is taking a stand against ridiculous tuition prices (which have increased by more than 1,000 percent in 30 years), slut-shaming and the double standards placed on not only female sex industry workers, but all women.
Compiled from an interview with Playboy and Knox’s personal essays for xojane.com, here are some life lessons from the Duke porn star:
# Take control of your life wherever possible. “In a world where women are so often robbed of their choice, I am completely in control of my sexuality,” Knox wrote.
Everyone should be in charge of their sexuality, but let sex serve as a metaphor for something with a grander effect. Your education, your career, your social relationships, your extracurricular endeavors, your sex life – you have the ability to take control of each. You might have to work at it, you might have to do something kind of crazy, but as Knox would tell you, it’s worth it.
# If you believe in personal freedom, you shouldn’t judge anyone for what they do with their bodies. Especially if you’re getting off by watching whatever they’re doing.
# Learn moderation and take personal responsibility. For Knox, the solution to a shortage of funds was to have sex in front a camera. For others, it may mean picking up a few extra opening shifts at the coffee shop or giving up cable TV (everything’s on the Internet, anyway).
# Some like it rough, and that’s OK. Knox said she has received criticism for her rougher performances, but she does it because she likes it.
“Sex-positive pornography is great, but I also love rough sex,” she told Playboy. “There are all types of sexual play, all types of sexual preferences and all types of sexual desire,” and – as long as they’re legal and consensual – they shouldn’t be shamed.
# Sexuality does not detract from one’s intelligence. Read Knox’s essays. She’s one profound lady, even at 18. And she got into Duke, which only admits 14 percent of applicants, so there’s that, too. If Knox were ignorant, she wouldn’t have started pornography. She would have dropped out of school and gotten a job at Abercrombie & Fitch.
Some commentators, such as the Washington Post’s Diana Reese, wonder why Knox wouldn’t simply “ask her financial aid counselor at school for help.” I’m sure she did. And I imagine she was told to get loans. So, instead of subjecting herself to a debt-sum large enough to buy a house, Knox did what she found smartest for herself and capitalized on her own assets rather than relying on others.
# Porn, usually, is not reality. “If you’re dating a guy who wants you to do everything that porn girls do, he’s an a**hole, and you should probably dump him,” Knox said in her Playboy interview. “What I advocate for is for partners to be communicative and mindful of their partner’s boundaries.”
So, even though you and your girlfriend might watch porn together, and she might like it, she shouldn’t be expected to mimic what she sees. Though, Knox adds, watching porn can generate new and interesting ideas in a sexual relationship.
# Sex does not reduce a woman. Regardless of your religious and personal beliefs, sex should not be seen as a degrading and shameful act.
Knox said she is troubled by the notion that “sex is something women ‘have’ but that they shouldn’t ‘give it away’ too soon # as though there’s only so much sex in any one woman, and sex is something she does for a man that necessarily requires losing something of herself.” Meanwhile, the men on the receiving end only gain from the act.
Knox adds that a woman’s ability to be a moral role model is wholly dependent on her sexuality, and that society has set up a norm “in which women simply cannot win.”
Though her path to porn began as a way to pay for school, it’s clear the job has come to mean more than money to Knox. It’s a battle, and we should be thanking her for fighting bravely. Do yourself a favor and Google “Belle Knox” to read her essays and interviews. Just be cautious of who’s in the room when clicking over to the images tab.
Tyler Killette is a senior majoring in mass communications and editor-in-chief. She can be reached at me@tylerkillette.com or on Twitter @tylerkillette.
